Monday, October 31, 2011

It's time....

At around 5am I awoke and was laying there  in my warm, comfortable bed mulling over some thoughts-as you do; and it came to me! Time is our biggest issue these days.......

Think back to how many times you've heard friends and family, frazzled and complaining that they just don't have time...... time to walk the dog, time to play with the children, time to tend to the garden.

I remember a conversation I had some time ago with an aquaintance; she commented on my vegie garden, stating "Oh I wish I had the time to have a vegie garden!" When I asked her why she didn't have the time, she said "I have to work" and when I politely asked why she had to she replied: "To put food on the table and pay for the childcare!" As I smiled politely ( and perhaps a tad knowingly) I saw the look of awareness dawn upon her face!

You see, my husband and I realised very early on that my working full time was not the best for us-financially or emotionally! We created a spreadsheet and listed ALL the costs involved with my employment: travel, clothing, makeup,haircare, childcare, convenience foods etc etc. Much to our surprise, we were only $20/week better off with my working! From that day, I have only ever worked in paid employment where the children were either with me ( or able to be cared for by my husband) and have found that I have the time to do most of the things we used to pay others for! Yes, at times it has been financially difficult-and we didn't have family around to help us with babysitting etc. Yet, we have managed to bring up 3 responsible, reliable members of society and our two daughters have both been involved with sport at a high level-travelling Internationally. We have a nice home and have worked hard for what we have-managing to do it on mainly one wage.

I'm constantly bemused by those who are rushing around madly, dropping the kids off at childcare, going to the gym to work out, complaining about the price of both these things and the fact that they seem to spend their lives in the car! Think of this: if you are not spending your day behind a desk, but are at home doing the housework and gardening to provide food for your family, then you won't need a gym membership to stay in shape! If you work less hours ( or none at all) you won't have those high childcare fees-and somebody else won't be bringing up your children! You can be the parent who is assisting at the school, being involved with excursions and reading programs.

I know that there are many who would lift up their voices to shout me down-mentioning women's liberation etc etc.....and to them I say that women have actually had many choices taken away from them-what sort of a society are we that women are leaving their babies of a few weeks old in the care of others for a full day, so that the mother can go back to work???

I shall step down from my soap box now..but I'm interested in what you think.


  1. i worked when i had to and often could not even find work as a single mother that afforded me the childcare needed. second marriage, we also found that my staying at home made better sense overall economically. my homemaking saved us the need for the second income. being a mother and housewife was my career choice. i never had ambitions to do anything else. i did a lot of volunteer work in my community also and brought the kids with me when they were young so they developed a sense of giving to the community as well as the fact that money is not the only compensation for a job well done.

  2. Well observed Dee! I remember 5 years ago being so desperate to get a job... and help out with the bills, and have adult conversation. However, that job was taken away from me a few months ago (curse the GFC) and we have worked out that we aren't that much worse off financially, and it is so much better for our family now (boys age 14 and 11) that I am home with them, and saving money by doing all the things that I didn't want to do anymore 5 years ago! Can't wait to move into our new house to start my vegie garden and get some chickens too! Sometimes we have to travel around in a circle to appreciate where we have come from!

  3. I really think this is a topic which needs more discussion-can you imagine if the mainstream media started promoting the benefits of encouraging families to have one parent staying at home? It frees up work for unemployed, lessens the stress level on parents and then their children benefit-to say nothing of the flow on benefits for the health system!


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